Wednesday, July 6, 2011

the mating rituals of the blue footed boobies ... and the rejection ....

i am a blue footed booby boy, i have small undilated eyes ... i am in search of blue footed booby girl ... i will know it is a girl because of her large pupils that look so very dilated .... 

ah, a girl .... here girl, this is my left foot, i hold it up to you ... look, it is blue ... 
she looked at my blue foot, hooray, i'll show her my other one .... 
here girl, this is my right foot, i hold it up to you ... look, it is blue ... 
hooray, she looked at my right foot too ... she saw that they are both blue ... 
(in human terms, she just said, ok, i'll give you my phone number ... still ample opportunity to shoot you down...)

ok, girl, you noticed my spectacularly blue feet, so now, i shall show you how well i can display myself ... i puff out my chest, lift my beak up as high as i can, i fluff out my wings ... i.look.huge..... i am huge ... look, i've made myself as big as possible .... fluffy feathers!! and then ... squrklblft, squrklblft .... i make loud noises ... notice me, notice me .... 
(in human terms, he just called and is waiting to see if she picks up or screens the call .... or maybe they are in a bar and he's dancing (oddly) hoping that she is watching...)

oh, no ... no eye contact ... i know she knows i'm here ... i know she's not making eye contact on purpose ... why has she turned her back on me? are my feet not blue enough? are my feathers not fluffed enough? is my squrklblft not loud enough? darn ... i'll have to start over ... 
(in human terms, he is simultaneously filled with self doubt and yet certain that she will see the error of her ways...)

hey, girl booby, i'm trying again.... look, my left foot is blue, can you see it?  oh yes, she saw it .... 
hey, girl booby, look, my right foot is blue too, can you see it? come on, make eye contact ... please see my foot ... it's a delightful blue color ....  hey, wait, i see a girl over there ... she'll think i'm cute .... 


tomorrow's blog post ... success and the blue footed booby dance .... 

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